I definitely met my husband at the right time in my life. I was four years into running a successful woman’s wear store, and had already started the Match Me brand. My confidence was high, I was in a really good place in my life and I was really loving the person that I had become. It was exactly the right time to meet the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
My track record of choosing men for myself was pretty terrible. I grew up in a broken home, which made me reluctant to find a life partner. I think that for a lot of my teenage years and in my 20s, I didn’t think that love with one person could last forever. I was choosing men that I felt needed me; they needed someone to help them build confidence and grow into who they were going to become, and they didn’t have these capabilities on their own. It was really exhausting to be in those kinds of relationships, but I was under the impression that if my own parents couldn’t make their relationship work, then how was I to make it happen. I didn’t realize that choosing someone that I thought was good for my life was up to me. I had to learn that it wasn’t my parents’ or anyone else’s decision.
Having been a matchmaker for three years prior to meeting Mike, it really gave me hope, because I knew I could help others find a compatible partner, and I really wanted that for myself. I spent a great deal of time really thinking about the type of person that I wanted to have in my life. I wanted him to be much like myself when it came to ambition, drive, and family values, and hoped he would have a similar type of personality. I also hoped to find someone that could open my eyes to a lot of new experiences, someone who could make me laugh, and who could hold her own in social situations too.
When I started to notice Mike, it was during the time I was running the clothing store. I would see him walk past a few days every week. What I noticed first about him was a confidence that I had seen in anybody else. It was how he carried himself that drew me to him. I was instantly intrigued.
I knew nothing about him, only that anytime I saw him I became incredibly nervous and uncomfortable in my own skin, but it was a good feeling. Exciting!
As time went by, I started to notice him more, but something inside of me made me so nervous that I wasn’t able to approach him until one night after a charity fashion show that we were both involved in. At this point, I had had a few glasses of wine, which probably helped build my confidence. After the event was winding down, I approached him, and asked him if he recognized me. I felt like he had to; there was a palpable chemistry between us, and it was powerful.
He played it really cool, and didn’t give me an answer as to whether not he had noticed me before, but I was certain that he had, since the attraction felt so strong. I didn’t feel like I could have all these feelings towards an absolute stranger!
So, for the next 20 minutes we spoke a bit about ourselves, but to be honest, it was quite loud where we were, and I couldn’t quite make out everything he was saying. I heard him mention chicken and farm, and immediately I jumped to the conclusion that he was a chicken farmer – and was kind of shocked because my expectations of who I thought he was going to be were completely different.
I headed out as I had to work early the next day, and was left wondering what all these feelings were about.
Mike and I ended up connecting on social media, and that allowed me to get to know him a lot better. I learned that he was the president of an organic chicken company, and that he also owned a vineyard in Prince Edward County that he called “his farm”. He fit my image of what I imagined my perfect match would be: he was driven and ambitious, just like myself. He had confidence, he was hilarious, he was charming, very smart and incredibly handsome.
We went on our first date about two months after the first time we formally met. It took us that long to make it happen, as we are both very busy and always seemed to have scheduling conflicts.
Our first date was not would you would expect. As we approached the agreed-upon time we were to meet, Mike kept contacting me to let me know that he was going to be late. First it was an hour, then it was two, then it was four. He was giving me the heads up throughout the day, but I was left wondering whether or not this guy was actually ready to meet anybody. I felt like he was making excuses. In reality, the poor guy was stuck in loads of traffic in a snowstorm, and was running late for his already scheduled meetings.
Mike and I ended up meeting a full four hours after the time we had initially agreed to meet. Once we connected, the date was absolutely perfect. From the first, I felt like I had known him forever; I was so perfectly comfortable with him, and really enjoyed how he spoke about his life, passions and dreams. It was such a pleasure getting to know him better, and I couldn’t help but get excited about our second date, even while we were still on our first.
During our discussion, Mike mentioned to me that he had been noticing me for months, and shared that he would’ve never approached me if I hadn’t made the first move. He knew about me, and about the businesses that I had started, and was completely intimidated. Ultimately, he told me that we would have never spoken if I hadn’t been bold enough to reach out the night of that charity event, and then afterward, keeping the conversation going on social media.
Mike later confided in me that the following day he went out with some of his friends and basically told them that I was the girl he was going to marry.
Sounds like a fairy tale? Perhaps. But it’s my fairy tale, and I’m happy to share it with you. For someone like me, who had convinced herself that true, lasting love was an elusive and unattainable thing, this is proof positive that dreams do come true. Mike was exactly as I had pictured him in every way.
So, if there’s a moral to this story, it goes something like this: don’t be afraid to visualize your perfect match. If you don’t, you are leaving the universe to fill in the blanks, and who knows what that could end up looking like. Define what you want, be clear about what you need, and don’t be afraid to put it into words – because you must make your intentions known before the universe can respond. I’m living proof that dreams can come true, just the way you envision it.